The Family Trifecta » Family Finds

If life were a balance beam…

Amy — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 12:04:52 +0000

… I would be getting .7 points deductions all the time. And now I read that there are 7 essential activities for a mental well-being???

As you know, I am trying very hard to balance all of the important aspects of my life. Working until 6:30 or 7 each day makes finding that balance a bit harder, but until I have proven myself as effective, smart and capable then it is what is required. Hopefully soon I will close some deals and get on top of my reports so that I buy myself a little freedom. In order to continue striving for the trifecta, I have to sacrifice in other areas. And maybe I need to rethink those priorities.

I often enter in all of my food intake in the “LiveStrong” application or online. My “daily plate” is never correctly balanced. I consider my nutrition an absolute fail. And now, according to the Harvard Business Review Blog, I need to have some of each of the following mental “nutrition” each day. Focus Time, Play Time, Connecting Time, Physical Time, Time in, Down Time and Sleep Time. Maybe LiveStrong will need to come out with a mental nutrition application as well. At least then I might do a better job of checking things off the list.

After reading the article, I decided I’d score myself on each of the 7 categories. Then maybe in a few months, I can revisit this baseline and see if I’m doing better. If you want to join me, I’d love to hear how you are doing now and we can touch base again after the summer and again during the holidays.

Here goes… (the part in red is the definition by David Rock)

Focus Time. When we closely focus on tasks in a goal-oriented way, taking on challenges that make deep connections in the brain. Okay – I’m doing pretty well on this one. Primarily because I have no choice. During the week I’m focused on work – figuring out how to better help my clients, determining when we are or are not a good fit and working to improve my product and industry knowledge. Then during the weekend I have to figure out what to do with a bunch of 4 year olds for an hour. A frustrating challenge but a definite challenge.

Play Time. When we allow ourselves to be spontaneous or creative, playfully enjoying novel experiences, which helps make new connections in the brain. I don’t have nearly enough of this during the week, let alone during the day. Everything I do is planned – maybe sometimes creative but rarely spontaneous. Scott helps me be better with this because he is actually pretty good at this. Although I think he would feel he doesn’t get enough “Play Time” either. We make memories for sure – but I think that fits better in the next category.

Connecting Time. When we connect with other people, ideally in person, richly activating the brain’s social circuitry. This one we do a lot of given the amount of time we have throughout the week. We often spend good quality time together as a family and with extended family. We do not do well in this area with friends. I wish we were better at connecting with people outside of the family – in person.

Physical Time. When we move our bodies, aerobically if possible, which strengthens the brain in many ways. TOTALLY SUCK on this one. I often think that I should wake up an hour earlier and work out. It is a fact that I feel WAY better when I am in shape and when I am making time for physical activities. Yesterday I walked 4 miles to and from the trade show. It was fantastic but far from my daily needs. My goal is to get working out during the summer – keep getting up as early as I was when I had to get the girls ready and to school. That should buy me some physical time. As long as I don’t decide I need more sleep time instead.

Time In. When we quietly reflect internally, focusing on sensations, images, feelings and thoughts, helping to better integrate the brain. Umm, “time in”? really – who has time to sit quietly and reflect? I might get a few minutes of this before I drift off to sleep – but if I get easily distracted and start going through my to do list and then I can’t fall asleep. So there’s a bit of challenge to address with this category. Maybe I could take a few minutes during work to go and sit quietly in the sun reflecting and feeling. Definitely worth a try.

Down Time. When we are non-focused, without any specific goal, and let our mind wander or simply relax, which helps our brain recharge. This is so important for me. I love having down time where Scott and I just sit quietly and watch a show. Time where I don’t have to think about anything important or anything at all. I get to laugh or cry or just sit. But then I feel guilty that I just wasted 20-40 minutes when I could have been blogging, reading, studying, cleaning, working out. So that doesn’t really help my well-being much. Maybe if I’m balancing the rest of the areas, I’ll feel better about the down time.

Sleep Time. When we give the brain the rest it needs to consolidate learning and recover from the experiences of the day. I totally need 8-9 hours. I typically get about 6-7. Hmmm.

Well there you have it. My “well-being nutrition” is a wreck.

How is yours?

Not Quick but Delicious

Amy — Wed, 19 Jan 2011 06:04:34 +0000

Several years ago, Coscto carried a Raclette grill by Trudeau. Scott had memories of eating around a Raclette as a missionary when church members would have them over for dinner. Because of awesome memories, Scott bought one and we were excited to try it. The first thing we realized was that our fancy grill was only good for4-6 people. So we searched and purchased a second. Amazon carries them now.

Over the years we have have had several dinner parties centered around these table top grills. And they are dinner parties that are talked about for years and asked for a repeat.

Here’s how it works…

There is a granite side and a non-stick side of the grill and under the grill are individual non-stick pans.

The granite side is for beef and chicken, the non-stick side is for seafood and the bottom side is for the vegetables and anything else that you want cooked in cheese and butter.

On our table we had plain steak and chicken, teriyaki steak and chicken, peppered steak, shrimp, halibut, grilled onions, mushrooms, spinach, sliced potatoes, steamed zucchini and steamed broccoli.

Everyone gathers around the table and cooks and eats and cooks and eats and cooks and eats – it is AWESOME. There has never been a time that it didn’t taste amazing. Nor has there ever been a time that the conversation stalled. Every time we’ve done it, the kids eventually leave the table and the adults are left to continue indulging themselves with shrimp cooked in butter with some cajun or lemon pepper seasoning and cheese melted on top. Delicious. Even picky eaters or those with special diet needs can indulge and eat the foods they want with the seasoning that they like.

It is an all day ordeal/event. We started cutting and marinating 4 hours before dinner. Dinner takes about an hour from start to finish. Then after dinner, there are two dishwasher loads full of dishes and granite grill plates that are soaked and scrubbed before the grills can be put away.

A few pointers – only use tongs for the meat, have separate tongs for raw chicken, have two butters (one for cooking and one for spreading on rolls), DO NOT scratch the non-stick surface or your grill won’t last you very long, use LOTS of butter. The last pointer – use olive oil on the granite slab while you are preheating it.

For $100 you can purchase a great tool that will be the source of dinner parties and excellent meals for years to come. Totally an investment in awesome memories.

PS – My Teriyaki Sauce recipe…

1/4 cup Kikkoman Teriyaki

3/4 cup Soy Sauce

2-3 tablespoons brown sugar

1 tsp garlic clove (minced)

pinch of ground ginger

A Real Friend…

Amy — Wed, 12 Jan 2011 04:58:02 +0000

It was my second semester of my freshman year. I walked into my Tuesday and Thursday Speech class. It was a general education class with a student teacher and I wasn’t all that excited for the class. I found a seat on the second to the last row in the middle of the room. Little did I know that the girl with the curly black hair sitting to my left on the back row would one day become my best friend. By the second week, I was sitting on the back row and the two of us were giggling and chatting through much of class. Soon we were eating lunch together with the girls. Vanessa, Melissa, Alisa and Erin all welcomed our new friend.

Over the years, Mel has always been there for me. Even when our lives took us in different directions, I always knew I could count on her friendship.

Today is her birthday and it is also marks 20 years of our friendship.

Over the years we’ve been through lots of boyfriends, a mission, graduation, 4 states, too many jobs to count, anxiety attacks while learning to SCUBA dive, a cruise, a wedding, a painful engagement, 2 kids, some tears, and many many years full of talking and laughing.

One day, 13 years ago, Mel and I wanted to make Spinach Artichoke dip. Today, with all of the food blogs, that would have been an easy search. Back then, we’d looked at the couple of cooking websites (like William-Sonoma and cooking.com). They didn’t have anything that we liked so we headed to Barnes and Noble. We went through dozens of cookbooks looking through all of the ingredients in each recipe. Finally we found it. Both of us still use this recipe. Sometimes Melissa will add a little kick to it, but I still stick to the recipe. (Melissa wrote it down on a piece of paper from my Franklin-Planner that I still have).

2 T butter
½ onion, chopped
1 clove garlic
1 can artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
1 small pkg frozen chopped spinach, thawed
1 8 oz cream cheese
½- ¾ pint sour cream
2 shakes WHITE Worcestershire Sauce
½ tsp white pepper
2 c parmesan cheese, shredded

Sauté onions in butter, add garlic when onions are almost clear. Once clear add artichoke hearts to sauté pan. Mix in spinach. Continue heating until warmed through out. Add cream cheese, stir in until melted. Add sour cream until desired consistency. Season with Worcestershire sauce and pepper. Stir in 1 c parmesan cheese.

While it is cooking on the stove, put wonton wraps in mini muffin tins. You’ll have to be careful, because it is very easy to put a fingernail through the very thin wraps. Then fill the shells with a little less than a tablespoon of the dip. Sprinkle remaining parmesan cheese on each cup.

Bake at 350 for 8 minutes. Watch them so that they don’t burn.

Melissa, here’s to another 20 years of friendship. Can’t wait to see everything else we get to go through. I love you and thank you for all that you do. Happy Birthday!

and Lolli

The BEST Christmas gift EVER!!!

Amy — Thu, 23 Dec 2010 05:42:49 +0000

Scott and I aren’t much into the Black Friday shopping. We did it our first year married and got so frustrated that everything we got up super early for was sold out by the time we got through the lines. Granted that was nearly 10 years ago and Black Friday wasn’t quite as big of a deal as it has evolved into.

This year we bought one gift on Black Friday. It was actually the gift that my parents gave our family. Scott was checking his emails and found a deal on CityDeals.

It was the Pass of all Passes. A season pass to Trafalga in Orem and Lehi, Seven Peaks in Provo and all of the Owls and Flash games you could ever want to see.

We knew it would be a fun gift and one that would help us with our quest to always enjoy today. We had no idea the extent of excitement that it would generate with our two little girls.

Jade threw herself on the floor and said, “I can’t say ‘thank you’ enough! This is the best Christmas present EVER!!!” She was even more excited when she found out that there are others in our extended family that will be receiving the “best Christmas gift ever”.

So, this year, Black Friday provided us with a full year of fun fun fun! I’m really excited about fun family activities that we don’t have to pay for every time we go. Hopefully it will mean that we all get really good at miniature golf and the batting cages.

Let the Reviews begin…

Amy — Thu, 25 Nov 2010 05:24:00 +0000

During the summer, I mentioned a few times that we went camping. This summer I learned that Scott had never had a true S’more until this year. Having finally introducing him to the camping favorite, I loved spending time at the “S’more Suite” during Blogher.

I am lover of S’mores (and other marshmallow treats) and am glad my kids have embraced the goodness that is chocolate, marshmallows and graham crackers.

Not long after I returned from Blogher ’10, I received a fairly large package in the mail. I was so excited when I opened it because this is what I found…

My girls were more excited than I was. We took them camping with us the very next weekend. There really is nothing better than a sticky gooey mess of roasted marshmallows sandwiched between graham crackers and real hershey’s chocolate.

Some advise when having S’mores…

1 – Don’t be cheap on the chocolate. Hershey’s really does melt smoothly and quickly. The graham crackers should be the crunch, not the chocolate.

2 – Everyone has their own preferred way of roasting marshmallows. Some like them black and charred. Others like them golden brown all the way around. And still others would prefer to pop them in their mouth without roasting them at all. For S’mores go for the evenly browned and just slightly swollen method. The charring ruins the flavor and not roasting them doesn’t melt the chocolate.

3 – Bring wet wipes. REALLY. Just because you may not have children around doesn’t mean you won’t get sticky. You just might get some in your hair.

Thank you so much to the S’mores team at Blogher for being so kind and sending me this really awesome care package.

Church and Kids – not always easy

Amy — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 06:33:04 +0000

I love that our church has a meeting when the whole family gets to sit together and pray together. But I also love that there is a time for the adults to meet together and finally a time for just the women to meet together. (Okay, the men meet together as well).

Having time to worship with the family in tow presents many challenges. When you are parents to a newborn you spend your time holding her and keeping her happy. Once she’s a little bit older you are still holding her and trying to keep her happy but you now have to entertain her (quietly). Then she gets a touch older and you have to wrestle with her and give her cheerios to keep her quiet. Once she’s about 1, you still have to entertain her but you can give her a toy that she might care enough about for a couple of minutes and you just might hear a bit of the sermon. You get to deal with the constant wrestle for all three hours until they are 18 months old. At which point you get to hand her off to the compassionate and sweet nursery teacher after the first hour.

Then for the next 6-7 years you still have to help them be quiet, have them not play with the baby behind you, not kick the row in front of you and help them learn to listen to the person speaking from the podium. All of this while you are trying to take something from the sermon as well.

With each child that comes into your family, you can expect to get less and less out of your church attendance. And then suddenly, the kids are old enough to sit quietly and listen to the speakers. I fear I still have a few more years until that happens.

Luckily I have found a few things that help ease the chaos and help both me and Scott listen to a bit more of the lesson or sermon. (The first two are very “LDS” focused.)

First – at Deseret Book they have a book called “The Big Book of Sacrament Activities” and the junior addition is great for those that are 6-8 year olds. It has proven to be a very good tool to keep Jade focused on gospel topics while staying quiet. It is a little old for Ivy, mostly because we have to read the directions to her for each activity and she wants our constant help.

Second – I was introduced to a website Scriptures4Kids that I am really enjoying. I downloaded and printed their sacrament activities for church on Sunday. Both of the kids loved doing them. Ivy still wanted Scott to look at every line she drew and asked several questions. But it was better than it has been.

Third – Both girls have a sketch pad (one of the good ones with thick paper and the spiral binding). These books are meant as journals and I ask them to draw something that they are thankful for, or something that happened during the week, or something that the speaker is talking about. These drawing will keep them both busy for quite a while. Plus we have a great documentation of how they are growing and improving.

Fourth – Coloring Books. I would like to say that they have coloring books that have pictures of the Nativity, or Noah’s Ark, or Jonah and the Whale, but those aren’t always so easy to find. So each girl has a Mickey Mouse coloring book or a Strawberry Shortcake book. Sometimes you just can’t force them to focus on the gospel for the whole meeting.

Fifth – Always have a few small treats because you KNOW they are going to get hungry or need a treat at some point.

How do you keep your kids quiet in church? Does the noise from other’s kids drive you nuts?

There are reviews coming…

Amy — Thu, 18 Nov 2010 04:46:48 +0000

Since Blogher I have received several very cool products.

During Blogher I received even more cool products.

But I haven’t written about any of them yet. It is time to start doing it. So be prepared for some nifty reviews.

See all the cool stuff I got?

I love finding cool things

Amy — Tue, 16 Nov 2010 02:39:28 +0000

At Jade’s school we are supposed to volunteer for at least 40 hours a year. When you and your better half both work full-time, it is really hard to find the time to get those 40 hours in. So I try to chaperon field trips as often as I can make it work. Unfortunately I was late to Back-to-School night and the field trips were mostly all taken. I am chaperoning a couple, but not nearly enough to get to my 40 hours.

Last year I managed the scholastic book orders. That took a little bit of time.

This year I found the perfect role for me to get volunteer hours. Historian.

So I discovered a great way to be a class historian. Shutterfly has “ShareSites” and if you do a classroom one it is totally secure. You have to be invited and you must have a shutterfly account with that email address. Once you are a member of the site, you have the rights to add photos and posts and calendar events.

It was so cool, I decided to do one for the dance companies at our studio.

From the website parents can create a photobook or order prints. How cool is that???

I’m so excited! Go create your own classroom site (and while you are signing up, you get 50 prints for FREE)!

**** PS I received nothing from Shutterfly, I wasn’t asked to do this by Shutterfly, I simply found it on my own.

The days are too short

Amy — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 05:54:46 +0000

And I realized today that I haven’t taken a single picture this month. I told Scott and he asked if I was feeling okay.

We believe in making memories whenever possible. But the last 10 days we’ve been lazy and tired. Everyone has been fighting off the flu or a cold.

It makes me long for the sunny days of summer.

I’m going to have to get myself back in the groove and start taking more pictures. We need to re-focus our efforts to have fun and get more done.

_____________

Tuesday night we were all peacefully sleeping. No girls had found their way into our bed. (I love when my girls come in and cuddle, but not every night and I cherish the occasional night that I don’t have to sleep on my back with one girl cuddled into each arm).

Suddenly Scott and I were rudely awakened by a loud and shrill beep.

I looked at the clock and it was 3:15. (I’ve never been okay with waking up at 3:15, it actually really freaks me out. If you have ever watched the movie “Amityville Horror” you understand why that time of night gives me the creeps).

In a panic Scott ran to the hall where our smoke alarm was going off. We didn’t smell smoke so he disconnected it to see if it was the battery. After he replaced the battery he plugged it back in. Immediately the shrill beeps began again. They were so high and so loud that they made me dizzy.

Then I noticed it wasn’t the smoke alarm going off but our carbon monoxide alarm. And the one downstairs went off as well.

We opened all of the windows and the alarm turned off. The rest of the night we left the windows wide open and we turned the heater off.

Scott and I laid in bed. Both researching Carbon Monoxide. He on his iPad and me on my phone. Apparently what we should have done is quickly gotten out of the house and called 911. They will come and test it while the alarm is going off. Oops – our bad.

I said a silent prayer and thanked Heavenly Father for protecting our little family. And I tried not to think about what could have been a very sad scene if we didn’t have an alarm.

Scott went and got both girls and brought them into our bed, we closed our door and got a space heater to keep us warm the rest of the night. Finally we all fell asleep. Just in time for our wake-up alarm to go off.

The next day we had the “Heater Guy” come out. Alex went through our whole house testing for carbon monoxide with his cool tools. Luckily he found none, only a “clunk” when the heater turned on.

If you do not have a Carbon Monoxide detector, please go and get one. They can save your life, and the occasional “false alarm” can serve as a gentle reminder that life is fragile and there are things that we can do to prevent damaging it. By the way, the girls did not wake up to the alarm and neither remember hearing it in the night. They now have alarms that have a voice warning because studies have shown that children wake up to a voice quicker than they do an alarm.

Do you have a carbon monoxide alarm? How many smoke detectors do you have?

Microsoft and the Cloud

Amy — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 23:51:00 +0000

I just had to share that I think the new Windows 7 and cloud is completely cool. No, I’m not being asked to say this nor compensated in any way. I simply think it is very cool. Anyway, I’m just starting to play with it and can’t wait to update my other computer that is running Win7 with the cloud. Then I’ll be able to tell you more what cool things it can do.